Fingerprints and Paperwork and Living on the Edge

Spring is a time of renewed hope for man many people. Gone are the dark, cold days of winter. There is more sunlight, birds sing again, the grass begins to transition from dark brown and muddy to something we remember called "green". We know, here in the Boston area, that while we were wrapped in layers of warm clothes just yesterday, in a few weeks time the humidity will give us a Florida-like feel.

Springtime in New England also causes another emotion to awaken within me: moving angst. I know that is not terribly spiritual, but it's the truth. Every spring when we are in New England I know that in a few weeks time all I own will be in a suitcase and I will be travelling again. It is also a time for paperwork in various forms: fingerprints to be sent off with work permit applications, medical work to be copied and taken abroad, school results to be exchanged with a new institution, address changes, bank changes, driver's license changes, auto transfers, insurance cancellations, insurance renewals, insurance changes, and of course, the inevitable visa process which accompanies the work permit. In short, spring means paperwork.

It also means a limited amount of time to say good-bye again. This time we will not be gone for as long a period as in the past, but our parents are in their mid-80's and we've not been home much in 20 years. Lives are increasingly busy and finding time to get together is harder as well. I looked at the calender the other day and realized that I knew what we were doing all but two weekends between now and when we hope to depart. I also thought, "Gee, I'm getting kind of old for this". I think I said that in 2003 as well.

Life has a tendency to cycle. The first time we left was heart wrenching and I was kept going by those verses from Hebrews 11 that speaks of those who long for a better country, "whose builder and maker is God". Twenty-one years later I find myself struggling to leave for different reasons and I need to remind myself that I still am a "stranger and foreigner" in the course of a long sojourn towards Zion. In fact much of the past year I have been coming to grips with the fact that this particular departure is a step of faith similar to the one we first made when we started. We never "get off the hook" in terms of needing to walk by faith. If we do, we are probably camping out in the wrong place.

One of the best adages we heard this furlough was from Dale, who is a fellow missionary. He was telling us of a time when he and his wife came through a storm and thought maybe the idea of itinerant preaching looked pretty good, not to mention a lot less stressful than what they had just been going through. His son said, "Dad, if you aren't living on the edge, you're taking up too much room". That was a comment that confirmed to Dale and his wife it was time to head back into missions.

I like that comment. Yeah, we are getting older. I have yet to meet anyone who is not. The goal is not to be blinded by paperwork, discouraged that we don't move as fast as we once did, or that we wouldn't mind having a home of our own sometime. The goal is stay on the edge and in the words of Ps. 84, " to go from strength to strength till (we) appear before God in Zion".